The Black Grouse can exclusively reveal the reason for the latest hold-up in the reconstruction of the long awaited replacement hide at the Point of Ayr.
The current delay is said to be due to the relevant authorities having to conduct an ‘impact assessment’, but this blog understands the real reason for the delay is due to concerns the RSPB raised when it was discovered that the new structure would be pointed directly towards Mecca. The organisation has also gone as far as producing an artist's impression (pictured above) of what the potential chaos may look like.
Said RSPB spokesperson Fatimah Niqab:
“When we found out that the new hide was facing that most holy of sites to our Islamic brothers, we were concerned that it would turn into a ‘de facto’ place of worship or a ‘Mosque’ as we tend to call them.”
The Memsahib went on to say:
“We were obviously worried that it would develop into a place of pilgrimage and that the subsequent increase in visitors would overwhelm the current parking facilities.”
Fears have also been raised by regular holidaymakers to the local static caravan concentration camps at nearby Talacre.
One shaven headed and tattooed wag commented:
“Before you know it there will be a Minaret, with a Muezzin blaring out the call to prayer every five minutes. How do you expect me to sleep off my twenty pints of Stella with that Hullabaloo?”
Until later – unless I am the subject of a Fatwa.
The current delay is said to be due to the relevant authorities having to conduct an ‘impact assessment’, but this blog understands the real reason for the delay is due to concerns the RSPB raised when it was discovered that the new structure would be pointed directly towards Mecca. The organisation has also gone as far as producing an artist's impression (pictured above) of what the potential chaos may look like.
Said RSPB spokesperson Fatimah Niqab:
“When we found out that the new hide was facing that most holy of sites to our Islamic brothers, we were concerned that it would turn into a ‘de facto’ place of worship or a ‘Mosque’ as we tend to call them.”
The Memsahib went on to say:
“We were obviously worried that it would develop into a place of pilgrimage and that the subsequent increase in visitors would overwhelm the current parking facilities.”
Fears have also been raised by regular holidaymakers to the local static caravan concentration camps at nearby Talacre.
One shaven headed and tattooed wag commented:
“Before you know it there will be a Minaret, with a Muezzin blaring out the call to prayer every five minutes. How do you expect me to sleep off my twenty pints of Stella with that Hullabaloo?”
Until later – unless I am the subject of a Fatwa.
Hi Paul
ReplyDeleteI think you have missed your true vocation.
You really should have been a satire writer.
you could of made a few bob as well.
Keith D
Hi Paul
ReplyDeleteAnother visit to Shotton Pools Nature Reserve,and YES YOU'VE GUESSED IT !
I'M HACKED OFF AGAIN !
When I arrived at 9 O'clock this morning there were 5 vehicles there,but not Birders,OOOH NO !
They were merrily chomping their way through another area of good cover and vegitation to joyfully install their all conquering new Hide....SHAME THERE WERE NO BIRDS ON THE WATER THOUGH !
Also there was a Team of Sprayers,who were working their way around the Reserve,and literally spraying every single Fungi,Weed,and young Bramble shoot they could find.
Firstly the area that they were clearing holds a Chaffinch Roost,some 300 strong,or should I say,did do,and this now on top of already removing all the rough vegitation and Brambles that had previously held at least 1 Cetti's Warbler,or should I say,did do!!
So let's look at the evidence shall we.....
1.Demolish Chaffinch Roost
2.Remove the Reserves most Iconic bird for good
3.Remove sections of Reedbed that have for years held breeding Warbler's.
4.Large scale poisoning of Rats,Mink,or any other supposed predator,in an attempt to regain the Tern Colony.
5.CCTV to be installed to see if they can see any type of predator that might have supposedly caused the Terns to 'Skidaddle'
6.AND BEST OF ALL....ALLOWING SCHOOLCHILDREN AS YOUNG AS 10 ONTO THE RESERVE "WILLY NILLY"....which I'm totally in favour of.....BUT FORBIDDING MEMBERS TO BRING THEIR CHILDREN UNTIL THEY ARE AT LEAST 14 YEARS OLD.
7.SOME NATURE RESERVE FOLKS,SOME NATURE RESERVE !
Cheers Denzil
Paul, all that's missing from this latest post is a cartoon of Mohammed.
ReplyDeleteS Rushdie
Hi ggreat reading your post
ReplyDelete